Your Slice of Pie

Story by Grace Fawcett

December 27 – January 20 // Pecan Pie: When I hear the words “pecan pie”, I hear them in a strong Southern twang with a hint of Paula Deen. Country and down-home, this pie is rich and fulfilling. This is how your future looks, my friend. You have great prospects, whether you know it or not. You can do many things with your life and be satisfied. As Dr. Seuss would say, “Oh! the places you’ll go.”

January 21 – February 25 // Blueberry Pie: With blueberries, the larger the berry the more intense the flavor. Likewise, the larger the issue, the more rewarding overcoming it can be. Maybe you have a big issue in your life, and it seems impossible to get past. If you work at it, however, the results will be beyond rewarding. Keep working at whatever that is, and know that there is light at the end of the tunnel. Just like the juicy berries, your problems may result in a sweet result.

February 26 – March 17 // Coconut Cream Pie: Coconut is a delicacy that many people find hard to appreciate, due to taste and texture. There are two types of people in this world: those who love coconut, and those who hate it. Thus is the world for you, divided into your many adoring fans and various passionate haters. The two may easily be confused, especially if that person is Regina George. Keep careful watch…

March 18 – April 30 // Banana Cream Pie: Banana cream and coconut cream can very easily be confused. You grab a slice of pie, and surprise! It’s not what you expected. You may think you’re choosing a delightful treat, but you may be selecting a dreadful trap. Two things have been offered to you, and one is continuous bliss, and the other is fleeting pleasure. Make sure you know what the difference is before you commit.

May 1 – June 16 // Cherry Pie: Cherry pie seems simple and satisfying. It’s easy as pie. You are likely at a place in your life that feels relaxed. Stay satisfied, and let everything that comes your way fill you up with positivity. Don’t make things harder than they have to be, just keep things simple and you’ll be content.

June 17 – July 23 // Apple Pie: This is an American classic. Apple pie with a scoop of vanilla ice cream and you’re good to go for the night. You’re the opposite. You stray away from the ordinary, and try not to be like everyone else. You hate “the norm”, and don’t want to go with what anyone says. But if no one else jumped off of a cliff, would you?

July 24 – August 30 // Blackberry Pie: Blackberries have many different cells of fruity flesh. Each cell is nice and isolated from the others, and it’s only attachment is to the torus. You may feel alone and abandoned, but you have so much around you. You have people (cells) around you, and you all are attached by one common person or passion. And that blackberry would not be the same without you.

August 31 – September 23 // Rhubarb Pie: I have never tasted rhubarb pie, but a Google search tells me that it is a sweet and sour delight. You too, then, must be a sweet and sour something- or-other. You can be pleasant and considerate one moment, but the next you’re a guarded and grouchy troll. There is little consistency, but those who know you well know what to expect.

September 24 – November 9 // Lemon Meringue Pie: This pie is all out, over the top. There are so many layers of intricacy, kind of like an ogre or onions. You have many layers, many walls put up for no one to see behind. Almost like a video game, a person has to prove their worth before they move on to the next wall. This is a very protected way to live, and you likely won’t get hurt, but is the loneliness worth it?

November 10 – December 26 // Pumpkin Pie: A Thanksgiving favorite, pumpkin pie is a classic. You are too! You’re classy and sweet and spiced, and you go well with whipped cream. While some may consider you basic, you’re a staple that the dinner party is not complete without.